(upon real events)

I was a beginner dentist when a huge man came to my surgery for tooth extraction.

- Give me a good shot so that it won’t pe painful, doctor!

- Don’t worry, I’ll dope it well, but in case I see it hurts, I’ll give you another injection.

The extraction happened as it was supposed to, when the patient says:

- Do you know, doctor that you are in luck?

(Well…, yes, this big tooth came out in one piece from that huge man – I thought, but it is not only a question of luck…)
- As last time – he went on – I went to another doctor, who took out my tooth, but it hurt, but I tossed the doctor to the corner together with the tooth…

Well, yes, I wasn’t considering this aspect, but I memorized the importance of local anesthesia so well.


Scandalously flippant, arrogant young man came into my dental office with a list of 3 pages containing the dentists of 3 counties as after a leghty investigative research he chose me to tidy up his teeth.

So done the condition assessment, discussion, drilling…

In the meantime, little comments on my part:

        - Auch!

        -  Aw, maybe it shouldn’t have been done this way!

        - Mariann (the assistant), please, fetch something it is bady bleeding!

        - Geez, Mariann, do you think it is alright this way?

        - Aw, I can’t see anything!

        - Was this the tooth?

The (poor) guy turned into all shades of red and green. As a sockdolager at the end I spoke out:

- Aw, Mariann, what’s the time? Let’s hurry as the doctor is coming soon (we are the cleaning brigade).

And the guy said:

- Alright, it doesn’t mmmatter anymore…

However, by the time we finished all the treatments (he was a brave young man, came back many times) we departed as friends.


Middle aged lady:

- Doctor, can you make stair-stepping filling?

I might have a very puzzled expression while possible solutions were racing in my head. She went on:

- Because I was at a dentist earlier and she filled my tooth five times and it keeps falling off. She says I shouldn’t climb stairs with this filling, because it falls off because of that. But you know, dear doctor, I live on the fifth floor, there is no elevator and I have no money to buy a ground floor flat. Caould you help me, please?

Well, we solved this seemingly impossible problem, too in a way that both the lady’s filling and the flat remained.


The husband of one of my patient’s came in one day that he would need his wife’s panoramic X-Ray. This is a fairly enlarged X-Ray picture of the entire lower and upper jaws. A few weeks later the wife showed up who told me the mysterious story of the birthday surprise from her husband. He framed the picture and hung it in the flat with the following title:

’MY WIFE’S MOUTH’ (Well, not a small one…)



- Dear doctor, can I wash my mouth out with a bit of palinka (brandy) after the treatment?

Wouldn’t you prescribe it as a medical recommendation, you know, for my wife to believe it…and would you happen to include taht I can swallow it?


- Mariann! The patient has a tiny mouth, 1 or 2 print spoon will be enough.

- Would you please, write it down, doctor, I would like to show it to my husband…



Easter Monday, 6 am – the phone rings.

- Good morning, doctor, I would like to make an appontment for a treatment.

After a few comatic shocked seconds:

- How long have you had the pain?

- It doesn’t hurt, I just would like an appointment for sometime next week.

My thoughts at that very moment won’t be written down no, but…



A fairly hard of hearing, kind elderly couple came to me for dental teratments (the gentleman even wrote a poem about it!). On one occasion we had to extract a tooth of the man, and his wife – as always – saw him to the office hand in hand. It was a loose tooth and the man stuck to not having an injection to the extraction. His wife indignantly (but hand in hand) was scoulding him:

-Of course! He is about to die of the lightest cold at home and here is playin the big boy!


We were preparing for an implantation, the patient was going numb in the chair (both ways) and we were just about to pull on the sterile gloves after the washing in: the left-handed glove turned up, then yet another left-handed glove! Poor patient wasn’t feeling any better that I am provided with two left-handed gloves…

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